2024–2025
Looking back at 2024
A strange year behind me, certainly. On the one hand — now in our new little home in Småland, Sweden — it was rather calm for the family. We made the house an actual home, found our first friends in the neighbourhood, explored the area, and generally lived our lives.
On the other hand, it was overly exciting on every other front. My wife started her own business, a big step to a more fulfilling life for her; I worked and learned quite a lot, also the reason I slowed down publishing on my blog*; and in bigger news, we'll already leave our beloved little space we made our home, as well as Sweden, in . But more on that later.
Our little home
As mentioned, since the beginning of the year we live in Bruzaholm, Sweden. We renovated, painted, decorated — we made it our cosy little place. The year began with minus 20 degree Celsius and lots of snow. Sounds cold, but it was spectacular.
In the summer we got a new member into our family, our dog Nori. She is a German Shepard mix that gets lovingly along with our daughter — not only that, even with the cats — we really love her.
As always, more C++
Like the last years I continued learning more C++, through work and, even more, privately. It was not an explicit goal for , though it took a major part of my free time I had for my studies. Not because I had to, but because I wanted to.
I wanted to learn more complicated topics, tried to close darker corners of my understanding of the language and ecosystem. What I gained is for sure a better view, especially on how big this landscape is, and that there'll be so much more to learn.
For those learnings, I originally wanted to bring Litr to version 1. I was so sure. Yet, it did not happen. I started a new project — yeah I know, as I've not had enough — a bigger and more ambitious one, that actually pushed me out of my comfort zone and helped more than I initially anticipated*.
Blender is love, Blender is life
Where C++ is learning for a more fulfilling professional life*, Blender is pure hobby and joy. No deadlines, no requirements; whatever I want. I love it. Naturally, I want to get better with the tools I use, so I tried more varied 3D modelling techniques. I really love learning.
I finally started to learn subdivision modelling, a long and tricky road, yet a fun one; continued to challenge myself almost every week, to create something, anything, even if not perfect; and started working more with procedural texturing and on my own small tools to help me in that process.
Anyway, opening Blender for me feels like getting a fresh piece of paper as a kid. The same feeling of endless possibilities to create anything I have in mind. Who cares about the outcome if the process is fun.
Writing, writing, writing
Even though I did not publish a lot, say through my blog, I wrote a lot. Some for my blog, yes, but mainly for my first fiction book I want to publish some day*. As mentioned in my last year's retrospective, I'm working on a world called Alsafi. I love the world-building part, and even more writing a book set in that world, the first Alsafi-story.
So it's all about rewriting. And more writing. And rewriting. And more writing, and … you get the gist. I'm going crazy over the smallest details, question anything, rearrange everything. I mainly try to cut things down currently, remove fluff, be consistent. All very hard problems for me, who never wrote a book. But fun. And I cannot wait to someday have the proper book in my hands, that I wrote.
Odin!
What I did not plan at all was me starting to look at a new programming language. I mean, I always love learning a new language; through this random urge I discovered Lua for myself and will never let it go again*. But with all the things I already have going on, why learn another programming language?
The answer is rather simple … because I wanted to, and it is fun. I came to look at Odin, finding out that the JangaFX suite is written in it. Those tools are custom, highly performant, and beautiful; besides being the useful tools they are. Naturally, I wanted to know how they were build, through which I found Odin.
And for me, Odin is exactly what it suggests, a better C*.
What I played this year
Same as always, I love video games and I've played a bunch of them. This is no ranking, at all, I just want to mention some of the games I played in that I did not play before. From new releases to older ones.
Pentiment
Released in I only managed to play it now — I shouldn't have waited so long. This 16th-century murder mystery is my absolute highlight of 2024, above any other game I've played. "Why, though?" asking myself. For once, the length is great, no too short, not too long, lagom*.
Visually, it was a feast. Not in a "high fidelity something-traced 3D graphics" way, but no less crafted with care and love, and plenty of detail. For example, different unique fonts representing different people and the level of education, taking over the role of voice-over artists. Little mistakes that get corrected while the text is written on screen as the character speaks, that was especially delightful for me. For someone who loves reading, this was pure joy and I did not once skip over this type of animation.
Another great example is the marginalia (little drawings in a book's margin). Partially used for pure artistic reasons, ranging from pretty to quirky; partially to show current characters mentioned in a scene; or to give further explanation to, e.g. a historical place.
Besides that, the whole game made me think about my life, a lot. My past decisions, the people I influenced knowing or unknowingly, where I want to go and how, and what will be left of me when I'm not around any more. How will I be remembered by my daughter, family, friends?
I know those are indeed typical thoughts a person might have — not the first time I had them too — but somehow Pentiment did it in a very touching way that got close to me.
That game, really stuck. It gave me the feeling of one of those "Game books" (e.g. Choose Your Own Adventure® book series), and I will never ever play Pentiment again. The one path I took feels almost precious, something I want to preserve the memory of, not water it down with another play-through and different choices. I for myself will just keep the memory of what I experienced the way I did — from a beautiful game.
Harold Halibut
Quirky, intriguing, lovely; that's what Harold Halibut is for me. I decided to play it on a hunch, purely based on the visuals. The game was made with stop-motion: clay, wood, textiles, metals. The heads of the characters of that world, not bigger than walnuts.
It tells a lovely story of the lab assistant Harold, on a spaceship crashed into the ocean of a far away planet. But the setting is much more grounded than it first seems, with a lovely story, and enough to explore that I spend more time in that world I ever imagined I would.
Indika
What a strange but captivating game about a nun and her connection to the devil. Or rather, her battling her own demons, and how others see her. Or her way of finding herself and what she really believes in? Or is it rather about the conflict between the church and her own and other peoples view of the world? All of it? None?
I'm not absolutely sure to be honest. Whatever it was, including the occasional feeling of being in a fever dream, it intrigued me with its art- and "differentness".
Star Wars Outlaws
For years, I did not play any Ubisoft game — feelings of fatigue on the always same and reappearing formula on how they approach any open world. On top, I'm not big on Star Wars games, the fantasy of playing a powerful Jedi leaves me cold. This time though, you're not playing a Jedi or whatever mighty character, you're just a smuggler, doing your thing, in an as it seemed beautiful crafted sci-fi world.
And it was, and I enjoyed it a lot. The world feels lived in, there was not too much going on all the time, not 100 icons with things I "need to do", making it overall feel less overwhelming to me. And yet, everywhere something was happening, in the details. People living their lives, guards scheming, technicians repairing ships — a world to immerse myself in.
The only thing I did not like was the mini-game Sabacc, where I only did what I really had to for story purposes. Otherwise, I did not touch it with a ten-meter pole. That was really no Gwent.
Senua's Saga: Hellblade II
I loved the first, and I did like the second game. As I was really looking forward to this game, with absolute amazing visuals, yet, it did fell short for me on multiple fronts.
As visually impressive as it was, this could also have been a 2-hour movie and I would have liked it just as much. The combat was simpler compared to the first game, and the puzzles were pretty straight forward. Not much else happened besides traversing the linear path of the environment.
I also think the first game would not have needed a second. It was a nice stand-alone story with a proper ending, while the story of the second game did not reach the heights of the first at all. Nevertheless, I have to say Melina Juergens performance as Senua was again magnificent and really stood out to me.
Baldur's Gate 3
I don't think I have much to add to this truly splendid game, a game that gave me endless possibilities for role-playing and will give me even more for years to come.
I poured more hours into this game in than I did into any other game, maybe even combined. And I still have so much to explore, ideas for new characters, alternate paths I want to take, and so on. Even only thinking about it writing this, I want to play again.
Astro Bot
A game in the truest sense of the word — what an amazing ride. Sometimes a classic platformer is the best, and Astro Bot was pure, fun, platforming. It combined high fidelity visuals, joyful game mechanics, and a colourful world with some of the most difficult levels I ever played.
Mastering those difficult levels felt truly rewarding, other level were just plain fun. Even the end-credits: chefs kiss, would blast again. I know I will get Astro Bot out whenever I need a good old round of video gaming.
Nobody Wants to die
A noir murder thriller set in a futuristic environment — no need to convince me more. It was great. Not a massive game that will eat all my time, and I appreciate this very much, it was perfect. A great story, told with the right pacing, and a superb atmosphere.
Still wakes the deep
Being on an oil rig already feels tense to me. But having that rig overrun by monsters, falling apart, while needing to escape with no way to fight back … Still wakes the deep was a really tense game that gave me partial Alien: Isolation vibes*.
Demon's Souls Remake
I'm late to the party, I know. I owned the Demon's Souls remake since buying the PlayStation 5 at release and never played it, until now, somewhat intimated by the difficulty, as I'm not really a souls or souls-like player. Thanks to the warm recommendation of a friend, I gave it a shot.
And after I really tried and stuck with it, I need to say it is an amazing game. I love it, and it made me start playing other souls-like games now too. Like an entry drug, Demon's Souls did its part.
My past goals
Looking back at last years goals, I'm surprised of how much of them I actually worked on. There is only one I did not even consider, building Litr version 1. I wanted to use Litr to deepen my C++ knowledge and instead worked on a much bigger C++ project. Thankfully Litr in its current state is already all I need, so that was not too bad.
On anything else I did actually work on; even more. Writing and expanding the world of Alsafi, learning more 3D modelling, adding new blog posts (even if fewer than I planned), and I had fun. I also started to work more with Godot and am really liking it. Besides that I worked a lot more with C++ and Lua.
Onwards to
No year goes by without me settings some new goals for myself. So here I go …
1. Having fun
Again? Yes, yes again. Fun is what this all should be. I love learning, I have fun exploring new things, and even if some of those things can be stressful, Fun should be the main focus.
2. Alsafi
This will be a goal for years to come. What I started a while ago I want to constantly expand, this world, and finally publish my first book set in it. I also want a world wiki where I can publish and browse all the available information. The wiki is planned to be written as if it is in-universe, including images, maps, videos, etc. and be available at alsafi.world
3. Keep on keeping on 3D
I love Blender, I even donate monthly. And I want to keep on keeping on working with 3D modelling. I'm learning more and more, and I have many areas that need further developing to be at a point where I feel happy with it. I also started to explore new ways for texturing, like hand painted textures inspired by the great technouveau, as well as procedural texturing through a node-based tool I'm working on to replace Substance Designer with*.
4. Blogging
I want this to be a better defined goal. Last year I thought I can just "publish when things are ready", but I'm a perfectionist, therefore I published only little. I will go back to a past goal, to publish at least once per month. With this "stricter" goal, I hope I can push myself to blog more.
5. New job, new country
No matter what I want to work on or have planned, I need to be gentle with myself. will be full of big changes for me and my family: I start a new job for which we will move to Finland, my wife will expand her business, a new language (Finnish) to learn, a new day care for my child. That's only what we know so far. So yeah, I should be thoughtful to myself.
Wrap it up, please!
And with this, another year is gone. Shitty things happen in the world I did not mention here, because this is my happy place. Sadly, the world gets less of a happy place for many, year after year. More war, the rich getting richer, humans and human rights treated like garbage, the environment burned, the internet salted, AI slop everywhere …
I don't need to write all that down here, because many of those events will be part of the recorded history. I just hope history will be written by better people. No matter the prospect, I still believe that we all can be collectively better, I just have to.
And with that I'll end this article simple with: fuck Nazis, trans rights are human rights, black lives matter, eat the rich, delete generative AI.
Until then 👋🏻